Welcome back and Happy New Year to all! We reigned in the new year with the Solemnity of Mary while recuperating from a long journey. Our little family recently returned from our first ever Christmas adventure as three. We left the Shire-like fields of the Midwest in search of snowcapped mountains and family we haven’t seen in months. We spent the days leading up to Christmas playing tourist in my childhood home after an 18 hour drive across country with the little one. Though it was a big ask for our baby girl, still less than a year old, she was a trooper throughout the trip and was showered with love from her grandparents when we arrived. The hubby and I sent up countless prayers before and during this journey to Mary to intercede for our daughter and soothe her along the way. As usual, the Blessed Mother was listening. Although we didn’t see quite as much snow as we were hoping to or have as many hiking opportunities as we’re accustomed to, this Christmas vacation to Colorado was a wonderful blessing which I’ll be talking more about in the coming weeks. For now, I pray everyone had a holy and happy Christmas.
The holy season of Advent has begun once again! Amid the secular hustle and bustle of holiday decorating and shopping this should also be a time of spiritual reflection and prayer. Thanks to a rockstar hubby and our parish annual Advent Vespers series, this new mommy was able to participate in both. While my husband put the little one to bed I headed to church for evening prayer.
I hadn’t realized how truly full and busy our days had become until I sat silently in that candlelit sanctuary. This is by no means a complaint. Our daughter has filled our lives with more joy than we knew we were capable of and we continue to fall more in love with her every day. With her lighting up our world with adorable baby babble, there simply aren’t many moments to pause for quiet reflection. This was an opportunity for which I am immensely grateful to my husband. It was a blessed night out in which I was able to sit with Christ and pray for two of the people I love the very most without distraction.
We expend so much time and energy maintaining our relationships with our loved ones. However, we often forget to love Christ in a similar fashion. These Vespers services are among my favorite events put on at our parish as their main purpose is to do just that. During that hour spent surrounded by fellow parishioners while lost in my own silent prayers I felt the presence of the holy spirit in the room. I felt a deeper connection with God than I have in months and was overwhelmed with a sense of peace. I pray everyone is able to grow in their relationship with Christ this season.
In lieu of chocolate Advent calendars this year, my sister combined a beloved family tradition of ours with this season of preparation for the coming of Christ. Every year during Advent we break out a puzzle with the goal of completing it by Christmas. This year my sister gifted us a beautiful nativity puzzle specially designed for such a project.
Bouncing a baby through her first ever holiday season has been one of the greatest blessings of my life and has also completely zapped my usual blogging time. The spare moments which used to be dedicated to accumulating nature photos and stringing together flowery writings are often consumed with dirty diapers and baby giggles. Thus, today’s post comes to you from one frozen grey afternoon in Indiana when we finally saw the first flurries of snow drift through the bare trees. I pray everyone had a happy Thanksgiving filled with family and good food. I also hope this Advent season can be a time of reflection for everyone. Happy Friday!
Amid numerous walks this year with baby girl, watching the autumn chill drain the color from the world was like watching a master painter in reverse. Each and every perfectly shaded petal faded to monochrome by the tiniest increment every day, beautiful long after full bloom just as God intended.
During our time running our parish marriage prep ministry we’ve met many dutiful and faithful Catholics approaching the Sacrament of holy matrimony. However, the majority of them are somewhat uninformed and unpracticed when it comes to Natural Family Planning (NFP). As Catholics we must always be open to life which means we avoid the use of birth control and contraceptives which deprive us of God’s gifts and blessings. This does not mean we are prohibited from making informed decisions about when to grow our families. This is where NFP comes in. There are a number of methods for tracking a woman’s natural menstrual cycle in order to determine times of high and low fertility. Equipped with this knowledge it is possible to choose when to invite new little ones into the world. While this can be a highly effective means of family planning it is not without its difficulties and so today I want to share some of the pros and cons of using NFP.
Pros
During those times when you are not actively looking to grow your family, NFP is as effective as any birth control at preventing unplanned pregnancies. One common misconception about NFP is that it is unscientific and imprecise. However, when properly adhered to, it’s an incredibly reliable means of planning and spacing pregnancies.
NFP is completely natural and free of the hormones and chemicals present in birth control used to artificially regulate a woman’s cycle and which can be harmful to her. Birth control can and often does come with a number of side effects including headaches, mood swings, decreased libido and even weight gain. It can also correlate with rare but more serious risks like blood clots, cancer and ectopic pregnancies.
Practicing NFP can help to grow the trust and affection between you and your spouse. Whether you are trying to become pregnant or not, using NFP is a team effort. You and your spouse will be called to periods of abstinence during which you will have to find other ways of expressing your affection for one another beyond sexual intimacy. This might look like you both picking up extra little chores around the house or treating yourselves to a night out.
Cons
Because NFP relies entirely on a woman’s menstrual cycle, it is most effective and easiest to practice when her cycle is regular. Through adherence to healthy diet, sleep and exercise a lady can naturally regulate her menstrual periods. However, for some women, this is simply not possible, whether due to demanding work schedules or the presence of small children in the home. Even something as mundane as a common cold can be enough to throw off her calendar. Long stretches of abstinence can put strain on your marriage. We Catholics believe that the sexual embrace is a renewing of a couple’s marital vows and a necessary part of holy matrimony, not just for the purpose of conceiving children. However, for those women who struggle with a regular cycle, there may be weeks or even months of abstinence when it will be necessary to find other ways to come together in your marriage. NFP often calls for heightened self discipline and support from your spouse.
These are certainly not the only considerations when using NFP. Many people are unaware of the abortive aspect of hormonal birth control. Likewise, women often find they are much more confident in their knowledge of their own bodies when they start using NFP. Unfortunately, it is also true that using NFP requires constant commitment and sacrifice but on the whole, and from a Catholic perspective, the pros far outweigh the cons.
As I write this post, mid-November, we are still patiently awaiting the first snow of the season. There’s a persistent chill in the air and the ghoulish Halloween decorations are being replaced by cheery lights and candy canes. However, for several weeks, our neighborhood was ablaze with colors like this. It was a blessing to watch the trees rain down their fiery foliage in Indiana this season.
It’s easy to let a tinge of despair creep into our lives if all we ever do is watch the news. The broadcast worthy stories hardly ever seem to have happy endings (excluding our recent and historic election. Yippee!). I firmly believe it is the responsibility of every individual to be informed of the happenings in the world. However, every now and then, we all need to turn off the news and simply enjoy life. When we go out into the world and participate we discover once again that people really are remarkable. They’re resilient and intelligent and passionate, each fueled by a perfectly distinct and driving fire to do something important. For many, this manifests in a career.
In a family of engineers, doctors and soldiers, I am surrounded by these people, hardworking individuals who have devoted their lives to the service of others. When speaking with them it requires no effort to see that their chosen fields of work are no less than a calling from God. In some way they are each duty bound to make use of their talents and passion for the betterment of humanity.
Throughout my life I have been constantly inspired by these people though I admit that I’ve also found myself incredibly envious at times. I’ve never felt similarly compelled to any particular career and for a long time I wondered if this was a deficiency of my own character. My driving fire has never infused in me a need to participate in great technological advancements or save lives or defend the innocent. Rather I believe I inherited the hospitality bug from my mom. I like to feed people. I delight in home cooking, music and good conversation, despite being tremendously shy. I am most fulfilled while bringing warmth and good cheer to friends, family and strangers alike.
Although I am perfectly content in my decision to be a stay at home mom, lately I’ve been feeling the need to justify this choice. We live in a time where everyone is free to chase their dreams to the ends of the earth and encouraged to do so. Our society tells men and women alike that they should have careers and that these will be their most important contributions to the world. I am a member of a generation which has been brought up under the belief that a college degree and a good job are the markers of ultimate success. For some, my bowing out of such a job in the steel industry seems akin to throwing away a dream, especially considering the years of education and work which went into acquiring it.
This is something I’ve considered long and hard and I truly don’t believe that I’m throwing away anything. Though it was a perfectly good job and may have turned into a career had I stayed, for me it was always done in the service of my actual dream, to be a wife and mother. It may seem a far less ambitious calling than those of my relatives. It’s likely that no one will ever remember my deeds as particularly noteworthy. However, in a world of geniuses and heroes, I am simply called to be a wife and a mom. I couldn’t be happier!
Sometimes, immersing ourselves in nature’s loveliness is as easy as leaning in for a closer look. As the air turns cold and the leaves rain from the trees, I’m remembering blessed summer moments like this.
During a camping trip this summer we were blessed to share our campsite with some unexpected visitors. Our baby girl giggled while meeting these feathered friends and they happily grazed about camp all weekend long.
Blessed in the Midwest 