This is surely a simple question for most Catholics in the world. When fully engrossed in the faith, the contrast between chastity and abstinence is obvious and in light of that knowledge there is but one correct choice whether someone be called to marriage or religious life. However, before coming to the Church I saw little difference and even thought the two to be synonymous. In all honesty, chastity wasn’t a term in my vocabulary. I’d certainly heard the word, mostly in reference to the cumbersome accessory maid Marian wore in the comedy, Robinhood: Men in Tights, and I had a general, albeit incomplete, understanding of what it meant. 

Far more often in real life applications I had heard reference to abstinence. This was the term used in school health class and by medical professionals, always championed as the single totally foolproof method for avoiding a surprise, unwanted pregnancy. There lies the difference. Abstinence is birth control. Engaging in this practice is to abstain from sexual activity, not for any moral or spiritual reason, but rather for the sole purpose of avoiding the conception of new life which might result from that activity. Though they are often lumped together, this is actually in total opposition to the virtue of chastity. 

It wasn’t until a Catholic friend once politely corrected my terminology on the subject that I considered the possibility that there was any meaningful difference. All Catholics, regardless of their vocation, are called to remain chaste. We reserve the sexual embrace only for sacramental, holy marriage for the purposes of renewing marriage vows and conceiving children. Of course, this means that those in religious life are indeed called to abstain from sexual activity  as they serve God directly through work in the Church rather than through service to a spouse. This is also where natural family planning (NFP) comes into play for married couples in order to make informed decisions about starting families. 

However, at the core of this Catholic teaching, we are always open to the possibility of life, no matter what kind of service God has called us to. We do not put barriers between ourselves and God’s will whether that be through hormonal birth control or total abstinence for the sake of avoiding pregnancy. We must always be open and willing to receive God’s gifts and blessings.